I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
