there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
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