see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
