In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
