The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
