Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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