Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
