Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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