SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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