Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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