Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
