oh god the rape fog is back!
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
