i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
i've created a new STD.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
