OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
