ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
