he was CRYING into my vagina
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
We have started to decorate penises.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
