I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
