For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
