is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
