why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
