Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize