So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
