i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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