Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm bleeding and have questions
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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