Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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