Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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