Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
