Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
