would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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