I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize