please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize