I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
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