but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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