she was so not down for the gang bang
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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