She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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