can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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