I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
