You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
