last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
