i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
