the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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