i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
