I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
