Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
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