He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
This house was built for laser tag.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
