whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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