i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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