For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
