try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just gift wrapped bread.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
True strength comes from lack of pants
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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