you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Randomize
