He is an equal opportunity slut.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
