this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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